Me, Myself and Lonelines

Charlotte: I just feel so alone, even when I’m surrounded by other people.

Lost in Translation (2003)

The following dialogue is fictional and an attempted comedy (if you are amused) on the topic of loneliness.

Ex-GF: So how was your weekend?

Me: It was OK. Nothing much to speak of. I ended up spending a lot of time with one of my oldest friends.

Ex-GF: Who?

Me: Loneliness! My loyal and trustworthy friend. The two of us shared some quality time. We indulged in some self pity and the usual routine.

Ex-GF: Arghhh! Get real, you. You sat at home the whole weekend didn’t you?

Me: Yeah, so what! I was craving the solitude. You know the thing about loneliness? He has no hang ups. He appears without any fuss or grudge and when you want him to leave, he will leave.

Ex-GF: You know loneliness has been declared a disease, right?

Me: How dare you? You’d hurt his feelings, if he heard that. Sure, he can be a tricky customer at times. Like this one time, I wanted some quiet. I even set the mood up, put on some blues and sat myself down with a drink. I was just looking for the usual; a little wallow in self pity. But the son of a bitch, he tried to ram worthlessness, dejection, rejection and all my life’s failures down my throat. He can be persuasive too. You got to watch out when he tries that stuff, because that’s when he is at his most friendliest. He’ll try and introduce you to depression and the entire family.

Ex-GF: Where are your real friends? That’s who you need right now.

Me: Oh, they’re around; busy with their lives. But they can’t substitute and I don’t blame them. They are there for me when I need them, with all their concerns. But it isn’t them i needed right then.

Ex-GF: You need to fall in love again.

Me: Ahhh… That I look forward too! But you know the problems there. You’ve been there. The Aquarian thing. We take so long to fall in love and then when we finally do, we expect it to last forever. By the way, I think that is a curse bestowed on the Aquarians for being so cool. Anyway when it doesn’t last, the heartbreak is a major drag. And you know who is there to help clean up the mess? Loneliness. We cry alone! And once we are back on our feet having pieced together the million broken pieces of our heart, loneliness, leaves just like the good friend he is.

Ex-GF: Hmpfh.. Well.. probably you should consider spending your life alone then. He won’t ever leave your side!

Me: Now your being rude. Anyway, he (loneliness) isn’t monogamous. Besides, they have invented a new word for me to live up to: the extroverted introvert.

Ex-GF: Your intelligence may be your one saving grace. You seem to have things under control. I just hope you do. Anyway, give my regards to loneliness next time you meet him.

Me: Of course I have “things” under control. That’s why i needed to be alone. To put “things” into perspective. You can say hi to him yourself. I’ll ask him to pay you a visit.

Ex-GF: Thanks, but no thanks. I am too afraid to meet him.

Me: Fear nothing, but seek always to understand. Anyway, so long.

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